Perfect Match Secret Marriage Chapter 180
For the next few days, Kang Jun and Lu AnLing were in a trance like state. Awkwardness surrounded them like a cloud of miasma and it was eating at them both.
Due to the information they had learned, confusion and pain were laid bare. They were happy Kang Mei Xue was their child but the news of his other child's death severely wounded Kang Jun and he didn't know what to do at the moment.
Though, not only that bothered him. Kang Mingyu's mother was also dead, how would he tell this to the boy when he grew up. Kang Jun was sure that the boy would not be afraid of mother's forever.
So many things began to stress his mind and many crazy thoughts, involving his own family, swarmed his head. There was a mystery to be solved. That was for sure, but right now he didn't care about solving it. Only destroying whoever had instigated it.
He had to come up with a plan but he had so much grief within him that he didn't know where to start. Kang Jun was always so logical, and cold. He never made a move using his emotions alone but now, he felt as if he could willingly send himself to his death if it meant getting revenge for his deceased child.
The mere thought of her made his heart squeeze.
Meanwhile, Lu AnLing who had lived with this pain for years on end didn't know how to comfort Kang Jun.
Learning something so cruel so abruptly must have sent his mind into disarray. It had done that to her back then and because of it, she had tried to kill herself... but she was sure that Kang Jun wouldn't do this. There was a fire in his eyes that she noticed clearly but it wasn't the good kind.
There were many stages of grief and Lu AnLing had been through them all and she was sure that, from this moment on, so would Kang Jun but unlike how she was back then, she wouldn't allow Kang Jun to be alone.
As Kang Jun sat on a bench with her in a large park, Lu AnLing excused herself. She quickly ran over to the nearest bakery and bought whatever the baker said was the tastiest and then she ran back over to Kang Jun.
As Kang Jun was in a daze Lu AnLing took a macaron out of the box and she pressed it to his lip. Feeling the strange sensation, Kang Jun frowned and turned to look at Lu AnLing who ate a macaron with her other hand.
"Eat!" She commanded.
The man wasn't in the mood but, not wanting to argue with her, he did as he was told.
The macarons were delicious but at the moment Kang Jun couldn't taste a thing. Suddenly, Lu AnLing shoved a cream puff his hand.
Once again she commanded, "eat."
And once again Kang Jun ate, tasting nothing but air.
Arriving the third time, Kang Jun didn't eat, instead, he said, "I know what you're trying to do,"
She was trying to cheer him up and he loved that she was doing this. He felt a slight bit better but it didn't make the pain in his heart leave him.
In his voice, Lu AnLing heard something which she understood well. The man was about to tell her that he needed some time to think the situation through. She had asked for the same thing once upon a time and then the more she didn't talk about it the harder it got.
How she now wished she had had someone to talk to. Someone who understood, at least in the slightest, what she had been feeling.
Giving Kang Jun an empathetic gaze, Lu AnLing said,
"I know this is hard. I know it hurts and I know you'll probably never got over this. I know because I myself feel constant pain when I think about..." she felt herself choke but she pushed through, "about her. But I'm here for you. We can talk about it and figure out what to do next..."
Lu AnLing looked at Kang Jun with crystal clear eyes. It was utterly transparent and at that moment Kang Jun saw sadness, love, and pain; all mixed together.
He would have imagined that those emotions would have created utter confusion but Lu AnLing only thought of moving forward.
Lu AnLing took the man's hands and looked deeper into his eyes.
In the end, Kang Jun would never let go of this, Lu AnLing understood that well but... "we will love and we will live with her in our hearts. No child would ever want to their parents to be crippled by the thought of them."
Those words touched his heart and made him nod unconsciously.
As if she was wiping away his tears, Lu AnLing touched Kang Jun's face and smiled.
"I will be with you forever. No matter what we find out." She said to him sincerely.
Hearing her words, Kang Jun wrapped his arms around her tightly. His head buried itself into the crook of her neck and his eyes stung with unshed tears.
The man didn't cry, he never did but when he spoke, it sounded like a sob.
Lu AnLing and Kang Jun stayed on that bench for a long moment. Sometimes in silence and sometimes in deep conversation, the two laid their emotions bare but even then they felt as if they hadn't said enough. No words could quite explain their pain and their thankfulness to the one sitting by their side.
"AnLing, I love you. I mean it. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me..." Kang Jun couldn't help but say to her.
Lu AnLing smiled softly. "Me too, Jun. I can no longer imagine my life without you by my side. I love you so much."
Hearing her own words, Lu AnLing blushed.
"My god we're being so cheesy..." Lu AnLing said burying an eclair in her mouth.
As soon as she did that, Kang Jun gave her a look. Holding the eclair in her mouth as if she was sucking it, Lu AnLing blushed, took a bite and then said, "pervert!"
Kang Jun gave Lu AnLing a look of innocence.
"What did I do?"
Lu AnLing pouted. "You know exactly what you did."
Kang Jun laughed at her reaction. Suddenly he reached into the box of sweets and pulled out the last cream puff and ate it before he stood up.
"You're done?" He asked her.
Lu AnLing nodded.
Seeing this, Kang Jun extended his hand to her and said, "come. I have somewhere to bring you. Though I'll need you to close your eyes."
Lu AnLing took the man's hand, closed her eyes and allowed herself to be led.
The couple walked through the little town hand in hand until the reached a shop at the corner of the street.
There they entered and Kang Jun said, "Open. "
Lu AnLing did as the man commanded.
As soon as the girl opened her eyes she was in a room full of glass cases containing jewelry of every kind. Lu AnLing had an idea why there were there but she didn't want to assume anything so she turned to Kang Jun and said,
"Jun..." she wasn't sure what to ask.
Understanding this, Kang Jun said, "I want us to pick our rings. This will only be temporary rings though. Later I'll have some custom made in the design of your choice. "
Hearing him say that, Lu AnLing smiled widely before she jumped into his arms. "Kang Jun I love you."
When she finally let go of him she took the man's hand and said, "let's chose together."
The two walked around the store for a small while examining every couple ring there was. There were so many designs to chose from that Lu AnLing was stuck. Though thinking about how Kang Jun was going to have other ones made, she decided to choose a very plain white gold wedding band.
The clerk looked at the rings and said, "that's a good choice. I see a lot of couples come in here and take some extravagant rings with lots of jewels but I find the simple ones more appealing. They don't scream 'hey, were married, look at us!' Instead they have some class..."
Kang Jun smiled at Lu AnLing and answered the clerk. "I agree."
Then the clerk spotted Lu AnLing's ring and said, "though that ring your wearing is just fabulous."
Looking down at her hand, Lu AnLing touched her ring and said, "... yes, I asked a uhh, friend to have this ring custom made in order for me to remember my child by..."
By friend, Lu AnLing meant Madame Durand. After her many suicide attempts, when she was finally stable, she asked for this and Madame Durand had allowed it.
Hearing this, the clerks face turned pale. "I'm sorry for your loss."
Lu AnLing smiled sadly at the girl and shook her head. With that said, the woman went to the back of the store to get the rings, leaving Kang Jun and Lu AnLing alone.
Kang Jun touched the ring sadly.
"I'm sorry..." he said.
Lu AnLing furrowed her eyebrows. "For what?"
Kang Jun: "For not being there for you."
Hearing this, Lu AnLing frowned and then she grabbed the man's cheeks before she pulled him closer to her. She laid her forehead on his and said, "Don't blame yourself. I don't... from now on, let's remember the past but not wallow in it. I want us to concentrate on the present and make sure to never feel that pain ever again."
Kang Jun agreed with her.
"I will do that. I promise." The man said and he sealed it with a kiss.